I had this whole post written about how I’m not usually an angry person, but that flying the friendly skies (Notice how rarely you hear that phrase anymore? Yeah, there’s a reason.) gets the ire pumping through my veins like almost nothing else.
The post sat in draft status for a day, leaving me with plenty of time to think about it. I started contemplating all the other things that make me angry. The list got long. Then longer. Huh. Maybe I’m angrier than I thought I was.
Obviously, I get mad at all the normal shit: hypocrites, racism, homophobes, our government’s inability to get anything done in a timely fashion unless it’s to their benefit and the detriment of the general public. But really, it’s the little things that get me. Little things such as:
- People who don’t control their pungent flatulence on airplanes. I understand that one fart you didn’t think would smell, but really it did and now you’re just hoping the odor dissipates quickly so no one knows it was you. It’s when you’re crop dusting me in a seated position and I am required to stay in my seat that I really start to get pissed off. They have these things called “bathrooms” at the front and rear of the plane, asshole. Use them.
- Poor locker room etiquette. I can’t speak for men here, but there are some pretty disgusting ladies out there who need to realize the locker room is a public space. That means refraining from pumicing your feet next to me and rubbing your naked vajayjay against the sink. Honestly, how did you grow up that you think that type of behavior is acceptable in shared areas?
- In that same vein, the nasty, funky, sweaty people who don’t wipe off their gym equipment. With all due respect, I don’t want to press up against your still-warm bodily fluids because you’re too lazy to get a towel.
- Incidents like this (which isn’t such a little thing).
- Poor driving skills. It’s simple: use your turn signal, make sure your brake lights work, get off the phone, do the speed limit and stay out of the left lane unless you’re passing someone. It’s not rocket science.
- Paying by personal check at the grocery store. IT’S CALLED A DEBIT CARD. Use it and you might not get your ass kicked in the parking lot.
- Finding out via a Facebook status update that a friend IRL got engaged, is having a baby or has filed for divorce. Maybe we’re not really friends after all since I didn’t even warrant a personal phone call or e-mail? You tell me.
- Microsoft. Need I say more?
- When groups of people decide to dominate the sidewalk by walking four across so no one can pass them. Bonus when their speed is the rate of a toddler’s.
- The lack of greeting card options for people with non-nuclear families. I wrote about this the other day. Check out my rant here.
- Medical personnel who don’t knock on exam room doors before entering. That’s just plain bad manners regardless of who owns or leases the building. My mom always knocked on my bedroom door (even if she didn’t wait for a response before barging in).
- The fact that automobile drivers are required to wear seatbelts, but motorcycle drivers in Illinois aren’t even required to wear helmets. It doesn’t make any sense which leads me to believe these policies are more about money than safety.
- City dwellers who either don’t know or don’t care how to comport themselves on public transportation. Move all the way in, don’t block the doors and get your junk off open seats during rush hour. Also, if you can find it in your heart, refrain from throwing chicken bones and used condoms on the floor, and try to urinate and defecate somewhere outside of the train or bus.
Yes, it would appear I’m a bit angry at all the stupid little injustices in the world. The thing about anger, though, is that I don’t believe it’s always such a deadly sin – or a sin at all – if it’s channeled the right way. Anger can be the impetus to speak up, to change the fucked up things we see happening in our own lives and the world around us. I think that as long as I remain generally kind and respectful, I’m OK with being angry, too.