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Typology of Sins

Doctor Klown holds a Minor degree in Philosophy from UMass Amherst.


“Courtesy of the blind dog pride
the eyes of seekers turning wide
lost is he by someone else’s side
he who isn’t free…”

-Machinae Supremacy

“Never use a door when you can make one of your own.”

Kitty Pryde

In classic psychology and various other systems, normal human behavior can be divided into “oral” (Id) and “anal” (ego) types. Normal people balance (superego) these two trends.  Autistics are usually people who favor one type over the other too much. Way too much.

Given this psychological view, I tried to sort the classic seven sins into “First Circuit Sins”, and “Second Circuit Sins.”

The First Circuit Sins would include Gluttony, Lust, Sloth and Pride. First circuit sins can be generalized by the body’s appetites having victory over the mind. For example, someone who favors the first circuit too much will try to gain acceptance by pleasing everyone.  When this fails, he may turn to overeating, flamboyant stupidity, drug addiction, despondency or alcoholism (oral) as compensation.

The Second Circuit Sins would include Greed, Envy, Anger, and Pride. Second circuit sins generally come from a person’s ego having victory over the mind. Someone who favors the second circuit too much will try to gain power by dominating everyone.  When this fails, he may turn to pathological lying, legal studies, or bullying (anal) as compensation.

Anyway, notice that pride appears twice in this system. Because it is actually 2 sins. For example, dogs and cats can be smart enough to have what we would call pride. But a dog’s pride is very different from that of a kitty.

A dog’s pride will drive him to commit first circuit sins. A dog will eat your cheeseburger but then feel bad about it afterwards. I call this kind of pride self-love.

A cat is one of the few animals with a fully developed ego. She is capable of committing second circuit sins. A cat will hold a grudge for years, and whose behavior may appear to be fraught with contradictions. I call this kind of pride vanity.

I find that people tend to be one type or the other, and it easy to tell, by what kind of problems they struggle against.

3 responses to “Typology of Sins”

  1. My cat read this and asked, "I can has cheez burger tu?"

  2. Jason Jason says:

    The world needs more epigraphs by Kitty Pryde. Bravo.

  3. Avatar llxt says:

    dogs are from mars, cats are from venus?

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December 2009
Season Finale
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August 2009