Cocktails, the Cubs & Other Complications
I wanted to write about the Bowl Championship Series in college football but that was too complicated. Besides the BCS, here is my top ten list of things that I find complicated:
10. Geometry 9. Spanish IV 8. Taxes 7. Judging for Olympic Ice Skating 6. Chicago Cubs 5. Writing in Chinese 4. Brain Surgery 3. Love 2. Politics 1. Religion
I make it a practice to avoid talking about these topics because they are too complicated except for the Chicago Cubs. The reason I can talk about the Cubs is because I am somewhat of an expert on the complicated history of this cursed team. Which brings me to this conclusion: Only someone who considers themselves an expert on a certain complicated subject feels comfortable writing or talking about that topic. So as an authority on alcohol, I offer these COMPLICATED cocktails.
C California Surfer Jagermeister Pineapple Juice Malibu Coconut Rum O Orgasm Peppermint Schnapps Bailey’s M Morning Wood Vodka Peach Schnapps Orange Juice Sour Mix Chambord (Raspberry Liqueur) P Purple Warrior Gin Southern Comfort Peach Schnapps Blue Curacao Lime Juice Grenadine Splash of Soda L Land Rover Dark Crème de cacao Dark Rum Captain Morgan Kahlua Bailey’s I Irish Car Bomb Guiness Jamison’s Kahlua Bailey’s (Bonus drink) Italian Stallion Sambuca Amaretto Frangelico C Chocolate Valentine Vanilla Vodka Dark Crème de cacao Cherry juice Splash of soda and cream A Almond Cookie Amaretto Butterscotch Schnapps T Tropical Passion Peach Schnapps Rum Sloe Gin Triple Sec Orange Juice E Elvis Presley Vodka Frangelico Crème de banana Bailey’s D Diehard Gold Rum Cinnamon Schnapps Citrus Vodka Whiskey Tequila Gin Banana juice Splash of milk
I suggest you sample 3 or 4 of these drinks, and afterwards I guarantee you will feel qualified to discuss any of the above complicated topics.