Up to No Good: Greatest Hits, Intoxicated Edition
We’ve all been there. Everyone has felt the effects of something – alcohol, drugs, love, hate, the smell of smoky delicious barbecue or what have you. Truth be told, any one of us could have written dozens of Intoxicated posts for 30POV this month. And I’m no different.
But rather than write a bunch of short stories or highlights – or write much of anything at all – I’ve decided to just share photographs from some of those intoxicated events in my life. After all, a picture speaks a thousand words, right? (And who would want to read 15,000+ words about my life?) Exactly. So, here are the greatest hits of my intoxicated {early} life, captured in photos.
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Real friends give lapdances. And better friends lick booze from your stomach while your entertaining them.
Following this night at Pat O’Brien’s on Bourbon Street, I was known as The Hurricane.
A 12-foot length of ½-inch diameter PVC tubing, an oversize oil funnel, and a six-pack worth of Bud Light makes for one helluva good beer bong. (Ignore the embarrassing 311 t-shirt.)
Wasn’t quick enough with the camera to catch my pal vomit “the world’s hottest wings” on the sidewalk, so I reenacted the crime.
Each year, on the Saturday of Memorial Day weekend, my friends celebrate ‘Stroh Day’ to honor the world’s best beer – Stroh’s.
Boobies. That is all.
Spent a week in Amsterdam to celebrate my 30th birthday.
Wearing my {Kentucky} Derby best and double-fisting cold beverages on the infield.
Karaoking Poison’s ‘Talk Dirty to Me’.
A very young Poopoopachu at an early morning “Kegs n’ Eggs” bar party.
Scratch what I said earlier about lapdances and the friends who perform them.
I’ve been intoxicated by the New York Mets since 1986.
A fuzzy pic of a fuzzy memory from a Sunday watching the Monsters of the Midway.
New to the neighborhood? Set off some car alarms and say “hello” to your neighbors.
This photo always reminds me of the opening scene in ‘The Way of the Gun’.
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The photos above span three decades, and each carries an epic Intoxicated story of its own. If you’re lucky, one night over a few rounds I’ll share ‘em with you.
About Mr. Poopoopachu
dam bro you topped me big time, you are the man
thats just amazing
One day I hope to post the more risqué lot of photos. …maybe in my memoirs…
this is made of win.
The existence of camera phones ensures that we'll have many, many more photos like these for years to come.
Oh, and Mike, thanks for checking out 30POV and my post!!
duuude….these pictures are hilarious!!!!!!!!!!
Each month I read your post, satisfied that I have seen you push yourself to the publishable limit. And then the next month you shatter that ceiling. Thank you for this. What a foolish and wonderful way to start the day.
Thank you for reading, and certainly for the kind feedback. Definitely check back next week, when 30POV will be running a second post of mine. It might be my best yet!
Oh, and I can I get that 311 shirt from you? I sort of have a collection. It's a Nebraska thing.
If I still have it, it's yours. But that photo is from 1999, so I can be sure it's still tucked away somewhere.
Picture 6: How do you do that?!
Believe it or not that photo was taken at a quiet, neighborhood tavern in the middle of the week. You'd think it was some club in Vegas or on Bourbon Street. Ha! The place was nearly empty except for a group of girls doing shots (always a good sign!). I went with the sure thing conversation starter: "Wow, you two have grrreat tits." Woke up the next morning and a friend had this photo on his phone. FTW!
It's rare when your expectations of a man are met to such an astonishing degree.
Thank you, sir. You're obviously speaking to my amazing photoshop skills in the eleventh photo, yes?
Ohhhhhhh…boy.
I feel like our night boozin' in Lexington could've been represented on here too. Unfortunately all I have to show for that fiasco is an original drawing by WreckedUm of a fat, toothless woman hollerin' 'Yehr goddamnright ah hadda titty in mah mouff!'
You kept it!!!?! (sniff)
No shit, man, it hangs in my office; taped to the side of my file cabinet.
I clearly need to live life a little more, and always pack my camera.
Hey, Darla! Thx for checking in and reading my post.
This is an amazing chronology of a lifetime of boozin' (sometimes pictures are far more effective). I'm thoroughly impressed by the boobie picture 🙂
You and me both, Charlotte. You and me both. Each is as big as my head – and I have a mutant-big head!
Bigass Titties!!!
Damn, folks. People are loving that one boobies pic. Sex does sell, huh? I'm going to start putting a booby photo in every post if it gets you guys commenting.
i have a lot of these i can pass along. no, they are not all self-portraits. only some.
Put up or shut up
epic stories i'd like to hear over our next round:
pat o'briens, kentucky derby, boobies, kegs/eggs, and photo-the-last. (not necessarily in that order…)
Jesus Christ man…
You really are a fucking deviant.
Poop for the win.
Thanks…I think? From what I've read in your posts, I don't think you're any less deviant, fent11111. And for that I commend you.
I approve of those boobies, sir. And also the hot wings.
wow. can't wait until you have kids and try and tell them NOT to drink…{insert me saving this post now as parenting blackmail}
[…] I was fully aware at the time that I was committing an ostensibly criminal act, but weighed the ease of the act (extremely simple) against the consequences (a slap on the wrist and a reprimand for violating the college’s residential code of conduct, whoopee). I got away with it too, mostly because I was smarter than most 19 year-olds drinking for the first time and I didn’t get stupid drunk. […]