My "New Decade" Resolutions
Ten years ago I was walking down the road. I wondered where would I be in the next decade. How would my life change for the better or worse. I was living with a good friend named Pat O. I was in between cars, relationships and jobs. I only had about fifty bucks and a six pack of some nasty brew. I wondered where did my 20’s go. I had at least 5 relationships – obviously none of those panned out. I had seven different jobs, one of those jobs was for 6 years, one was for 2 years. 1998 and 1999 were not good years for jobs. I had 6 different cars. The biggest problem was that three of those ten years, I didn’t own a car or have a driver’s license. I lived at six different addresses. I was on board a ship for 2 years. I slept at a numerous amount of friend’s houses.
Some of the good things during these years were my family – but I went to that well way too often. I met a lot of different people; I went to over 30 different countries; I won a lot of money at the casinos and enjoyed numerous one-night stands. All in all, I would have to say the bad outweighed the good.
My next decade was a lot more down to earth and happier. I was with only one woman; I cut the job thing down to four. I lived in one city, and I got a new family. But you can never have enough family – the more the merrier. I cut back on the car thing also and only had two cars. I think it’s time for a new car – a 2010 Camaro sounds good.
I want to end this decade on a good note. The problem is that I am all about sports and lately the sports news does not make me happy. Derek Jeter was named 2009 “Athlete of the Year.” “Why?” He didn’t even win the MVP. I have a strong case for a horse by the name of Rachel Alexandra to be the athlete of the year. She is 14-0 in all her races and 10-0 against male horses. My favorite football teams are not doing well. With all the infidelity going on with superstar personalities, I’m sure Derek Jeter will be caught cheating on his boyfriend soon enough. While I’m on the subject, the Associated Press announced today that Tiger Woods is “Athlete of the Decade.” If anyone read my last blog, I did finally find some dirt on Tiger.
So should I even make a prediction for the next decade? I find it easier to make “new decade” resolutions. First, make it to age 50 and start 50 POV.com. Second, quit smoking (planned for my 40th birthday.) Third, enjoy more quality time with my grandkids. Fourth, pitch a movie script about the Patriots with Matt Damon as Tom Brady. (This has to be quick because Matt is not getting any younger.) Of course, like every decade, I want the Cubs to win the World Series. Hell, I just want them to get to the World Series. I definitely want a couple of new cars, and I would like to come up with a new alcoholic drink. I have a few recipes in mind, just need an audience who is willing to indulge. I would like to see retirement for Brett Favre, Tim Wakefield, Shaquille O’Neil, Mark Martin, David Letterman, Regis Philbin and Oprah Winfrey. That might be an attainable goal, but I wouldn’t be surprised if all of these people are still making news headlines in 2020. Three more awesome grandkids would be cool. Also, the last thing I hope is that my 40’s are at least half as good as my 30’s. See ya next decade……………
About papimcgill
Thank you for giving me hope about my 30s. My 20s sound a lot like yours & I'm just glad to (hopefully!) be done with the bee ess.
if i promise to be your "audience" for the new beverage, can you find someone else to have those surplus grandkids???
I concur, Sir.
Shit, I might even kill Oprah myself.
Think of it as gift for your 40th Birthday; her limbless cadaver wrapped up in shiny paper and pink bow-ties.
I don't know. I think Favre is still going to be trying to get a contract 10 years from now.
It's funny. For the past week or two, I've been hearing about "Best Blank of the Decade" and whatnot. But it wasn't until reading this that it finally hit me that…wow. The decade is over and we're moving into a new one.
Guess I've just been a little preoccupied crying over this Lackey business.
I'd like to recommend Zac Efron as Tom Brady. Just sayin'.
Tell you what, Ang. We'll put Zac Efron and Matt Damon in a room together and see who comes out. That person can be TB.
Tell you what, Ang. We'll put Zac Efron and Matt Damon in a room together and see who comes out. That person can be TB.